Why the Doll Smiles
by Libby.not.a.slave.to.fashion
Summary: A narration of the Circus arc from Doll/Freckle's point of view. Some DollxCiel ish ness... OMG! Is this the first story with Doll as a main character!


**Why the Doll Smiles**

_Doll rode up on a horse to "Father's" mansion. Flames licked at every corner of the house, encasing it in a orange glow that would be burned into Doll's memory for the rest of her life. The flames held a deathly beauty, if Joker weren't in the house, she would have thought the flames beautiful._

Doll hated the dark, she truly despised the dark. But even more than the dark, she hated being alone. Being alone to her was the worst thing possible, she needed people, she needed _someone_. _Anyone_.

Being in her large tent all alone, even if she knew people where in tents all around her, drove her insane. She _hated_ it. So she took on another persona, that of a boy, so she could share a tent with one of the new recruits, if they made it.

_"What--What is this?" Doll huffed, suddenly out of breath. A thought struck her, she jumped off the horse and ran to the door of the burning mansion. "Brother! Brother Joker!" She screamed, stopping at the stairs._

She had to be "Doll" during the entrance exam, she dressed in her flowery, white dress and matching hat to hide her burns. Two men were trying out for the circus, or, more precisely, a butler and a young boy named Finnian. Doll had seen the butler the day earlier, he had been bitten by Betty and was miraculously unharmed. But the boy, the boy was so cute. He had deep blue-gray hair that hung just perfectly over his face. One of his eyes was covered by a white bandage, but the other one was a light, entrancing blue. His eyelashes were long, his figure slim, almost like a girl.

Doll assisted him with his tightrope walk. At first it was looking pretty bad, but somehow, magically, he recovered.

When Joker asked for him to smile, the boy looked uneasy, but smiled none the less. His smile was uplifting for Doll and she caught herself thinking that she could live just for that smile.

Joker introduced the pair to the circus as Black and Smile. Black was wearing the clothes he came in, but smile was dressed in a stripped shirt with a black vest on top, he wore suspenders holding up a pair of puffy shorts. He wore tights with lace on them on his legs, a pirate hat on his head and a new black eye patch. The newly named Smile looked shocked, but said "Nice to meet you," with a little encouragement from Black.

_"Bro-!" Doll coughed out, covering her mouth with her hand to stop the smoke from entering her lungs. Something appeared in the doorway and Doll stopped to watch it. It was a tall, black-clad man, carrying a child in his arms._

Doll performed her tightrope walk, getting applause from the audience. When she was done she changed her clothes and took on her persona of Freckles, to find out who she would share a tent with. She eagerly awaited the results of the lottery. Smile was in tent eight, with Doll. She smiled happily, she wouldn't be alone. Black was placed in tent nine, Smile was really upset by that, he started yelling but he got really mad when he found out Black would be sharing a tent with Suit. Doll just smiled.

When she got to their tent, she asked for the top bunk.

"Go ahead. I think I prefer the bottom anyways," Smile said, watching Doll climb the ladder. This was her chance to get to know the boy.

"S'been on my mind for a while. You speak some pretty fancy upper-class English, Don't cha?" Doll asked, peeking over the lip of the bunk.

"Pardon?" Smile said, reinforcing Doll's thoughts. "R-really? It's probably because I'd been working in a house since I was little." Smile said, a little uneasy.

"Blimey. Anyhoo, ya just gimme a shout if there's somethin' ya ain't ettin'! There's a long life of circus ahead of ya!" Doll said, looking through her things and finding candies. "Oh righ' wanna 'ave some sweets?" She said, dangling the candies over the edge of her bunk. "Them's from the popular Funtom company! What'd ya like, caramel, milk, or strawberry flavoured?" Doll really liked being with people, being able to talk to them and share with them.

_It was Black and Smile. They were coming out of the building. Black smirked down at her, while Smile had a distant glare. Black walked over to Doll. "Black... Smile? Why are you guys here... What happened? Brother is-" Doll yelled, hoping, praying, he was all right._

Doll woke up early, to find Smile still sleeping soundly. She smiled down at his sleeping form. She really liked this boy.

"Wakey-Wakey, Smile! It's time to get up, Smile. Hey. Hey!" Doll said, shaking the sleeping boy.

"Uh..m... Sebastian?" The boy muttered, his eyes fluttering open.

"Whatcha talkin' about, Smile?! I said, get up!" Doll said, slightly annoyed. Smile jolted to attention, covering his right eye with his hand. "Oh, your finally up," Doll said, surprised. "New comers 'ave t'get up early an' prepare breakfast! Ya ain't got time t' snooze!" Doll yelled. Smile grabbed his eye-patch and began getting dressed.

"Right!" He said, as Doll left the tent.

_"Dead." Black said, smirking. Doll froze, shock over coming her._

_"Eh- What are you saying, Black?! Hey! Smile! Say something!" Doll yelled, running the rest of the way to the two males. She grabbed Smile's shoulders and shook him lightly._

Doll waited impatiently outside the tent.

"Your slow, Smile! I'm gonna leave ya behind!" Doll yelled, rushing back into the tent, finding Smile mostly dressed.

"I'm going now!" Smile yelled, glaring at her.

_Smile slapped Doll's hand away, suddenly becoming responsive. "Don't... touch me so freely!" Smile screamed, glaring at Doll._

_"We were sent after you on her majesty the queen's orders," Black said, hugging Smile to his chest._

"Oh dear. You are going to have a difficult time untying a dead knot on your own." Black said, untying Smile's eye-patch. Everyone around looked at them, surprised. Doll started laughing happily.

"Smile, Black ain't your mum!" Doll laughed.

"No, it's-" Smile yelled, blushing.

_"To find the whereabouts of a series of missing children." Black said, mocking Doll with his smirk._

_"So you guys really were from the Yard!? To capture us..." Doll screamed, her world crumbling around her._

Doll walked over to see how Smile was doing peeling the potatoes she gave him earlier. "Smile, what're ya plannin' on makin' from them potatoes with peels thicker than the meat?" Doll asked, finding him cutting off half the potato just to get rid of the skin. Around him were three buckets, one with potatoes ready to be peeled, almost completely full, one with the peelings, that was over flowing and one with the insides of the potatoes, that was practically empty. "Smile! Whaddya think you're doin'?!" Doll yelled, seeing the peeled potatoes.

"I-I'm sorry!" Smile yelled.

"Cor blimey, what part of this can we eat?" Doll muttered, inspecting the potato. Smile looked away from Doll and the potatoes, sulking.

"It cannot be helped. I shall deep fry them as they are into crisps and make them into fish and chips," Black said, smiling. Doll's ears perked up.

"Cor! I love those!" Doll yelled, following Black.

_"No, that's not right." Black said, still mocking Doll with his smirk. "We came to eradicate you." Doll couldn't move, she didn't even try to. "The queen's watchdog, Phantomhive."_

_"The queen's... watchdog. Phantom... hive." Doll repeated, realizing the truth._

It was food time, and Doll was not going to be the last to get food. She knew better, if you took to long, there wasn't going to be any food left.

"Look, we're going, Smile! If we don't hurry we'll miss the meat!" Doll yelled, grabbing Smile's hand and dashing into the mob, screaming "Hey! Outta my way!"

After the dinnertime massacre, Doll sat down with Smile.

"What? Looks like ya only got bread in the end," Doll said, noticing the practically empty plate in front of Smile.

"Yeah..." Smile said, still slightly shocked at the fight.

"Well that's that. I'll share some of my grub with ya. You're skin 'n bones and so tiny, so eat up and grow some!" Doll said, giving Smile some of her food.

"Th-thank you very much."

"Anyhoo, Black is so good at cooking!" Doll said, smiling happily.

"I see," Smile said, glaring down at his food.

"I heard he's an ex-butler. So butlers can even cook? He made your failed potato peals this tasty!" Doll smiled again, it was good to smile.

"I see."

"Awright, I'm done! S'time for practice. Let's go!" Doll said, burping.

_"No way... Smile is... Your Phantomhive...? Are you saying it was all a lie?" Doll asked, all her memories of the past few days with Smile flashing before her eyes. "Everything... Everything!" Doll screamed._

Doll dragged Smile all the way to the practice tent. She convinced him to try balancing on one of the giant balls they had laying around.

"Ahh!" Smile screamed, falling off the ball and onto the ground. "Ow..." He said, rubbing his head.

"Oy, where's your sense of balance from when ya took the entrance exam? This is the basics! The basics!" Doll scolded, helping Smile up. "Black is amazin'!" Doll yelled, noticing the black-clad man balancing on three of the huge balls Smile fell off of earlier. "No, Suits ain't bad, either!" She continued, noticing the man balancing on about thirty pipes. "Their amazin'! You need to hurry up and get your act together again!" Doll said, pulling her eyes away from the two men.

"Right..." Smile said, glaring at Black.

Doll continued to push Smile the rest of training, but to no avail.

_"That's right. My name is Ciel Phantomhive. My job is just one. To clear the queen's worries." Smile, or, rather Ciel said, glaring down at Doll. "That's why I killed them. Kelvin, Joker." He looked at her like she was a piece of garbage, the lowest form of life to ever exist on Earth._

"I'm all sweaty! Why don't we go take a shower, Smile?" Doll sighed, turning to see her companion wheezing.

"Huh? There are showers?" Smile asked, perking up.

"Yeah, there are! 'Cuz it's cold at night, it's better to get in during the daytime!" Doll announced, marching off to the showers, Smile in tow. "See? Here," Doll said, pointing to an open space with twenty or so half-naked men splashing themselves with water.

"Shower... is this?!" Smile asked, shocked.

"Hey, strip down! I'll wash your back," Doll said, holding up a bucket of water to Smile.

"Out... outdoors in the dead of winter?! And with that water?!" Smile yelled.

"It's water, and? If ya just splash down and wipe yourself off immediately, you'll be fine! Them aristocrats say that ice swimming is good fer ya and it's all the rage!" Doll continued, trying to strip Smile forcefully.

"Woah! I'll pass after all!" Smile yelled, trying to get away.

"What? I said I don't mind it," Doll pressed, stripping the boy of his jacket.

"It's not that I mi-" Smile said, before tripping over a bucket of water and falling backwards, pulling Doll down with him. Smile fell on his side, under Doll.

"Blimey! Ya even got me soaked, fightin' back like that!" Doll scolded.

"Won't you please move?" Smiled asked, propping himself up on his hands.

"Geez we're soaked, so just give it up already and strip," Doll said, grabbing the bottom of Smile's shirt.

"Wait! Please stop that!" Smile said, grabbing Doll's hand.

"But your gonna catch a cold like that! C'mon!" Doll protested.

"Stop that!" Smile screamed, as Doll pulled his shirt up. She caught a glimpse of a brand on his back. The brand of a slave. "Let go of me!" Smile screamed, getting away from Doll and dashing off.

_"I killed them." That's when Doll noticed his eyes. The eyes she would remember for the rest of eternity. One, beautiful blue eye and one, light purple, with the sign of a demon. He made the forbidden contract. He might as well have been the demon himself._

Doll finished her act and the encore. She headed to a tent to change back into Freckles. Holding a lantern she walked to her tent, passing by a couple of boxes. She glanced at them and saw Smile crouching behind them.

"Hey. What're ya doin' 'ere?" She asked, holding up the lantern. "Don't move," She said, putting a hand over Smile's mouth.

"Hey Doll. Doll what are ya doing?" Dagger asked, poping up and watching her.

"Snake!" Doll yelled, grabbing at something. "A venomous snake was slithering about," Doll said, holding up the animal in question.

"Wha!" Dagger yelled.

"Didn't I tell ya not to let them loose outside?" Doll inquired, glancing at Snake.

"You'd better put 'em away properly in your room now!" Dagger yelled.

"I'm sorry for my carelessness that could have sent you to the next world," Snake said, walking away. As soon as the two left, Doll turned back to Smile, who had remained hidden through the episode.

"This way," She said, grabbing Smile's arm, and walking between the tents. "Hurry." Doll got on her hands and knees, and crawled under a beaded rope between two tents as she led Smile back to their tent. "Don't touch that rope," she said, glancing up at it. "It should be fine now since we came so far." Doll said, checking to see if anyone was around.

"Why did you help me?" Smile asked, coughing.

"Ya still don't get it?" Doll asked, untying the ribbon holding her hat made of roses on her head, and revealing her face. "It's me. Me!"

"Ah!" Smile said, pointing at her, shocked. "Freckles?!" He yelled. "Your a guy... yet you wear that costume...!?"

"How rude! It's obvious I'm a girl. Here." She said, grabbing Smile's hand and placing it on her breast. Smile, shocked, pulled his hand away quickly. "Ya can take a peek downstairs next if ya want." She said, smirking.

"No thank you!" Smile yelled, blushing.

"So, why were you in their anyways didn't Joker tell ya about those venomous snakes?" Doll pressed, folding her arms over her chest.

"About that... I'm sorry! I didn't actually steal anything today though. Please don't boot me out of here!" Smile screamed, putting his hands on his head.

"Today? Ya-!" Doll yelled, surprised.

"Before I became a page boy I was actually in East end doing all I could to survive. I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help myself. The mansion I previously worked for found out about it. I-If I was driven out of here I'd have to live in East end again." Smile said, shaking.

"So ya really didn't steal anything eh?" Doll asked, starting to feel guilty.

"No I didn't. I swear to God!" Smile said earnestly, clasping his hands together.

"Oh well I guess I have no Choice then. It's okay. Anyhow, I owe ya." Doll sighed, rubbing her head.

"Thank you so much!" Smile said.

"I think everyone has somethings about them that they don't want anyone to know, besides, I did something bad to ya today." Doll said. Smile's face darkened. "So I won't tell anyone about this. But now we're even. However, don't steal again, no matter what!" Doll scolded.

"Yes," Smile said, coughing again. "Um... can I ask you something? Why does a first tier member like you share a tent with me?" Smile asked, glancing at Doll.

"Ah... I'm just not a fan of private rooms. Staying with someone else seems to make me sleep better sometimes. I hope ya don't mind sharing a tent with me now that ya know I'm a first tier member." Doll said, turning to Smile, completely ignoring the gender issue.

"Of course not."

Doll giggled, smiling. "Neat. So we can keep what happened today our secret." She extended her had to the boy, who was smiling as well.

"Okay." They shook hands, making a silent vow to each other.

_"If we're going to do a circus, then we need stage names," the taller, red-headed boy said, smiling happily. "You'll be Beast, you'll be Dagger," Joker said, smiling stupidly and pointing to the girl with curly black hair and the boy with short black hair. "It's easy to understand so it's good," he smiled._

Doll was walking back to the tent she shared with Smile, when she heard an insane amount of coughing. She ran to where it was coming from to find Smile and Black. Smile was kneeling on the ground, coughing, while Black was behind him yelling.

"Smile?! What's wrong?!" Doll screamed.

_"Hey, hey, Give me one too!" The short girl with a burned face said, running up to the read-head._

_"Hmm... okay, you're Doll," he said, pointing to her._

_"Ehh?! I don't want a girly name like that! It doesn't fit me." The girl said, thinking about her face and blushing._

"It's asthma." the Doc said, after examining Smile for a while. Smile was laying on the bed, unconscious. He was really cute, but the thought never crossed Doll's mind because she was to busy worrying. The doc and Black spoke for a few moments, then Smile woke up. The Doc told him to be careful and to get some rest. Doll waited until everyone else left before crawling into bed with the sick boy. She was gone before he woke up the next mourning.

_"Of course it fits you. Because you're our cute little sister," he said, patting her head and smiling again. Doll came out of her memories, screaming her lungs out. This must be hell. It has to be. The one she had been forming a crush on, the one she could have loved with all her heart, killed her family._

The next mourning, Smile and Black were gone. The other members of the first tier said that they had gone into their tents and that they were probably from the Yard. Peter hit Doll a few times before Jumbo stopped him, but the mental pain was done. Doll's friends were gone.

Doll was sent to tell Joker about the two leaving along with Suit disappearing as well.

_"Give... I won't... forgive... I won't... forgive. I won't forgive!"__ Doll muttered, tears rushing to her eyes. She would kill him. No matter what, all memories, all feelings forgotten in rage. She was going to kill Ciel Phantomhive._

_**"I WON'T FORGIVE YOU!"** Doll screamed, grabbing a dagger from her bag, she got up and ran at the two people in front of her. **"SMILE!"** Her bangs flew past her face, reviling her burned, scared face. Ciel looked at her through half-closed lids. Mocking her. Mocking her for eternity, burning into her mind, into her very soul._

_"Sebastian." Ciel said, his eyes still mocking Doll. She barely had time to gasp before it was all over._

_

* * *

_

_Hurray for depressing stories!_

_D=_

_It's amazing that I wrote this while being so happy...  
_


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